Why Lewis Black Is Like Morgan Freeman September 30, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
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because he’s a very funny and talented guy who loses it when he starts to talk about politics like he does here
So he talks about Sarah Palin. Mind you I’m not even defending sarah Palin -but what he says is uninteresting, dull and most importantly not funny.
Morgan Freeman- stick to acting.
Lewis Black – stick to comedy.
Moron Of The Week September 30, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
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Celebrities Behaving Badly: One Jewish Man Who Won’t Lie To You September 30, 2011Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Scandals.
Tags: Ashton Kutcher, break-up, Demi Moore, Elisabetta Canalis, gay, George Clooney, jewish men lie, mistress, Nancy Grace, nip slip, Patti Stanger, promiscuity, Stacey Kiebler
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I happen to be a fan of “Millionaire Matchmaker”, mainly because I tend to feel much better about myself when I see a bunch of guys worth mega-millions who seem to have the social skills of your average teenage computer hacker. I also have a particular fondness for loud brassy aggressive Jewish women…it’s not for nothing that I’ve seen every episode of “The Nanny”, some of them two or three times on “Nick At Night”. So I’m rather familiar with Patti Stanger, who says what she thinks without any particular regard for who’s listening or who might be offended, and who thought she was wrong once…but she was mistaken.
Patti’s tendency to open her mouth well before engaging her brain landed her as celebrity moron-of-the-week, since Charlie Sheen has been on hiatus. Appearing on “Watch What Happens Live” last Sunday, Stanger generalized that gay men can’t stop being promiscuous and that “Jewish men lie”. Coincidentally, Andy Cohen, the host of the show, is Jewish and gay. Whoops! I’ll take the second contention first. I happen to be a Jewish male and while I can’t speak for all of my contemporaries, it’s a sure bet I’ve gotten myself in a hell of a lot more trouble over the years being brutally honest than I ever did dissembling. If you check the comments in any of the many articles reviewing Patti’s remarks, you’ll find a lot of remarks like, “It’s not that Jewish men lie. It’s that all men lie. They’re men.” Fine, I’ll keep that in mind next time one of you asks me if your ass looks fat in these pants.
As to Stanger’s implication that gay males are congenital man-sluts, she’s certainly not telling us anything we haven’t heard before. In this case the counter-argument that all men tend toward promiscuity might be valid…you know, that whole evolutionary benefit to spreading your seed far and wide and all that. It just seems that heterosexual men more often make the choice of monogamy, perhaps because of our understanding of the consequences doled out by our heterosexual mates if we choose to do otherwise. So the conclusion here is that all men want to sample as many partners as possible, but that gay men are just better at it. For what it’s worth, there have been countless scientific and sociological studies on this very question. A recent study showed that most gay men and heterosexual men had about equal numbers of lifetime sexual partners, but a significant minority of gay men, 13%, had stratospheric numbers. I’m never sure how much credence to put in these surveys…they depend on people answering intimate questions honestly. Let’s see how many boxes got checked “yes” on the enemas with midgets question.
Speaking of the aforementioned Charlie Sheen, “Two And A Half Men” creator and producer Chuck Lorre is reportedly writing a tell-all memoir. If it really does tell all, they may have to stock it in the horror section, right next to Stephen King. By the way, if you ever find yourself bored with Angry Birds and internet porn, you might enjoy going to Chuck Lorre’s “vanity card” site. These are the little apocryphal stories, essays, and poems you see flash by your screen briefly at the end of “Big Bang Theory”, “Two And A Half Men” and other Lorre productions. They are uniformly brilliant.
Let’s talk “Dancing With The Stars” just a little bit. I’ve already reviewed the Nancy Grace “Janet Jackson moment”, an image I’ve tried unsuccessfully to banish from memory these last four days. Nancy still staunchly maintains that the nipple we all saw was not a nipple…apparently conservative talk-show hosts don’t have nipples. We’ll check it out with Sean Hannity. Grace’s lady parts apparently aren’t the only featured anatomy on the DWTS set. The queen of TMI, DWTS alum Kendra Wilkinson, tells us that she calmed her nerves every Tuesday by having sex in her trailer with husband Hank Baskett…or three lucky members of the dance troupe, depending on who was available (ok, I made that last part up.) This Tuesday, Elisabetta Canalis, George Clooney’s ex, who committed the unforgivable DWTS sin of being pissy with her dance pro, was summarily dismissed from the ballroom. She’s had a tough year, dumpage-wise. Clooney was probably not glued to his 80 inch HDTV at the villa Tuesday night. He spends most of his time these days looking UP:
Given Clooney’s proclivity for DWTS alumni, how long can it be before he hooks up with Wendy Williams??
I’m just sayin’. You want to know how good it is to be George Clooney? I’ll tell you. While filming his new movie, “The Ides Of March”, he went skinny dipping with Marisa Tomei and Evan Rachel Wood. Hell, I’d feel lucky just to get flashed by Whoopi Goldberg, let alone get naked with Marisa Tomei. I only went skinny dipping once in my life, back in high school. I think it was the origin of the term “shrinkage”…but hey, it was COLD water.
The set of Dancing With The Stars more or less proves that the world has gone mad, but not because of the reasons you might imagine. It’s not Bruno’s bombast or the frightening proliferation of fringe, spandex, and sequins. Yesterday, someone sent a “suspicious letter” containing a white powder addressed to “Dancing With The Stars“, which spurred an evacuation and a production shut-down. Note to whichever douche nozzle perpetrated this outrageous act of terrorism: If you don’t like Chaz Bono, Carson Kressley, or even Rob Kardashian, don’t vote for them, or just go back to watching Bill O’Reilly. And I hope the next powder you smell is on the rubber gloves right before they begin your full body cavity search.
In this week’s example of art imitating life, Ashton Kutcher, who’s taken over Charlie Sheen’s part of the testosterone-sated horndog on “Two And A Half Men” has reportedly separated from his wife of six years, Demi Moore. This was after pictures emerged of Ashton with 23-y/o Sara Leal (note: Demi is 48 and Ashton is 33).
I can’t imagine what Kutcher could be thinking. If he just sticks it out with Demi a few more years, he’ll never have the embarrassment of going to CVS for tampons ever again.
Finally, and I do mean finally, it’s over between Jesse James and Kat Von D. Really. This time it’s really over. She’s having the tatt of Jesse inked over with an orangutan ass…oh, wait…no change necessary.
Where’s My Little Joe? September 30, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
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Biden now claims Obama owns the economy. I’m sure they were overjoyed n the White House to hear him brag about that.
Smarter than Sarah Palin? Not in this world.
My Blogmate And I Could Be Replaced September 29, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
Every So Often, There’s A Faint Hint Of Good News September 29, 2011Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Health Care.
Tags: AIDS, circumcision, cure, HIV, vaccine
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Here’s what I don’t get: If you go to Huffington Post, the headline is about the Red Sox collapse and if you go to CNN.com you’ll see this month’s job report as the top story. Oh by the way, these scientists in Spain may have found the cure for AIDS. Makes no sense. And by the way, in the same story, it’s suggested that a major way to decrease HIV transmission is to encourage circumcision. Take that, San Francisco busybodies!
Meanwhile, Europe Is Dying September 29, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
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Please God, Not The Yankees Again September 29, 2011Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Sports.
Tags: bloomington, Bo Dietl, Brackett, Bullit, colts, indiana, Loren Spierer, Yankees
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I don’t pay virtually any attention to baseball, but you’d have to have been living in a remote cave in Borneo to not realize the frigging Yankees have won the World Series enough times already. Let’s not give New Yorkers any more reason to be arrogant and self-important than they already have. To give just one glaring example, there’s the private dick (appropriate term in this case) who’s been investigating the disappearance of IU co-ed Lauren Spierer. This jerkoff retired NYPD detective goes on “Good Morning New York” and calls the chief of police in Bloomington, “Gomer Pyle”…apparently not realizing that we actually have access to cable TV and the internet in Indiana. I don’t need any other motivation to hope for a Yankees collapse.
Meanwhile, I’m about to stop paying attention to professional football too. After losing Peyton Manning for the season (and quite possibly forever) the Colts announced yesterday that Gary Brackett and Melvin Bullit, their middle linebacker and free safety respectively, are also out for the season. If the Colts weren’t a lock for 0-14 before, you can bet the kids’ college fund now.
Great Games Last Night – World Series Preview September 29, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
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Odds of winning World Series:
Tampa Bay 10%
Most likely outcome- Phils over Yanks
(no odds for Red Sox, Braves)
More Krauthammer On Obama September 28, 2011Posted by Cory Franklin in Uncategorized.
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On President Obama stating in an interview with BET that, “In the first year or so, we spent a lot of time just doing the right thing and not worrying about selling what we were doing”:
That’s amazing. I mean, I would call it delusional if I thought he believed it. He’s telling us that he didn’t spend enough time selling “doing the right thing” — [by] which he meant Obamacare.
That’s what he spent a year and a half on! He gave what, 38 speeches? I lost count as he approached 40. He was out there all the time selling it. He sold it on television, he sold it to a joint session of Congress, he tried to sell it everywhere. The dogs didn’t like the dog food. That’s simply a fact.
The idea that somehow he has not been arguing enough, speaking enough, showing up on television enough, but instead intent on doing the right thing, is hilarious. I mean, right now he’s proposed a bill that’s ostensibly about jobs, that he knows he’s not going to pass. And even a Keynesian would object to because it’s only half the size of Stimulus I, which didn’t work itself.
And then secondly he’s got a bill which he says is about debt, that doesn’t do anything on debt. Half of his cuts are not extending the surge in Afghanistan and Iraq for another 10 years. We are out of Iraq in three months.
These are farcical attempts at legislation. And he’s pretending that he’s so intent on doing the right thing passing these bills that he hasn’t been selling enough. All he’s doing is selling! Even the joint address to Congress ostensibly about jobs was a selling job. It wasn’t … about getting a bill passed.