Celebrities Behaving Badly: Post-Halloween Edition: Skin To Win! November 1, 2013Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Scandals.
Tags: halloween costume, james brown, james toback, katy perry, little kim, miley cyrus, naked, niki minaj, orgies, Ron Jeremy, strap-on
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If you go to your local costume emporium and browse the racks, you will find a wide selection of attractive and amusing outfits including slutty nurse, slutty cop, slutty maid, slutty kitten, slutty politician, and slutty nun, to name just a few. But if you happen to be a Hollywood celebrity, with access to the finest costumes and make-up in the world, and if it’s your job to shock and titillate in the first place…well, the possibilities are exponentially multiplied. You know that the whole overexposed motif has proverbially jumped the shark when Ellen Degeneres joins the soft-core porn crowd:
Ok, someone please tell me that those are fake…not Niki’s, Ellen’s…please.
Miley Cyrus could have just gone as herself. Her VMA get-up is pretty much the best seller amongst the peasantry, foam finger included, but Miley chose to pay homage to an earlier rule-breaker, Little Kim, who rocked it in the 1999 VMA’s (remember?):
But the run-away winner in the what-the-fuck-could-she-possibly-have-been-thinking costume competition was without a doubt the sweet innocent Mormon ballroom dancer and Ryan Seacrest ex, Julianne Hough
Alex Trebek: “Never, not ever, not even if Oprah gives you permission.” Question: “When is blackface appropriate?” Julianne would have stirred up less controversy if she’d gotten jowls, a beer gut, donned a ten inch strap-on, and gone as Ron Jeremy:
Under the heading of “damned with faint praise”, Julianne’s brother Derek Hough rushed to her defense. Opined Derek, ”She’s my little baby sister and she’s the sweetest thing ever. She is just beyond beside herself… Obviously, it wasn’t her brightest moment in her life, but hopefully we can move on.”
“Your Honor, I’m completely innocent. Dude viciously attacked my fist with his face…” Chris Brown was arrested yet again and initially charged with felony assault after he and his bodyguard began wailing on some unfortunate photographer outside a D.C. hotel at 4:30am last Sunday. Guess the hour and a half of anger management he was sentenced to last time didn’t have much effect. Which, I suppose, is why Chris is headed back to…wait for it…yep, rehab. Here’s the predictable statement from Brown’s publicist: ”Chris Brown has elected to enter a rehab facility. His goal is to gain focus and insight into his past and recent behavior, enabling him to continue the pursuit of his life and his career from a healthier vantage point.” Hey, Chris, let me help you out with that whole “insight” thing: You’re a misogynistic thug with a short fuse and the conscience of a ferret. There, did that help?
Authorities in the largely Muslim country of Malaysia have summarily banned a scheduled concert by Ke$ha because of “cultural and religious sensitivities”:
Ke$ha offered to wear a fishnet burka, but apparently that wasn’t good enough.
On a related note, Katy Perry, in an interview on NPR, addressing no one in particular (MILEY!), advised young pop stars to not spend so much time “getting naked”:
Pot, meet Kettle. Kettle, meet Katy.
Ok, so do you know who James Toback is? Neither did I. He’s a somewhat famous screenwriter and director whose film, “Seduced and Abandoned”, came out this week on HBO. Why should we care about that? Only because Toback did an interview on Huffington Post Live where he talked about participating in orgies at James Brown’s mansion involving 20 women at a time.
So here’s the take-home lesson. If you look like the guy above, and you can get someone to believe that you can actually put them in a movie, you can get laid in twos and threes and twenties. Proof positive that life isn’t fair.
Over on “Dancing With The Stars”, the Jersey pixie, Snooki Polizzi was eliminated on Monday’s show, which was sort of a shame, because her dancing has improved every week, and her personality was beginning to grow on even an old curmudgeon like me. Snooki was so upset that she was genuinely too choked up to speak in her immediate post-elimination Tom Bergeron interview.
The most charming thing about the seeming firecracker from the Jersey Shore was her obvious insecurity while dancing, even though she was pretty good. Her week got worse after the elimination. Colorado radio disc jockey Steffan Tubbs, who reportedly thought his microphone was off (how often do we hear that?), referred to Snooki as “fucking ugly”. Given her persona when she ruled on Jersey Shore, you’d expect her to rip Tubbs a new one. Instead, she responded via Twitter: “No hard feelings Steffan Tubbs..i am “f*cking ugly” :(” This poor girl needs a 50cc dose of self-esteem, IV…STAT. Now I wish I’d given her more votes on DWTS.
Finally, it was announced that Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore have reached a settlement in their bitter divorce battle. Thank god. I know that nothing makes me feel better than when a couple of pampered celebs can figure out an equitable way to divvy up half a billion bucks. I’ll sleep better tonight.
Celbrities Behaving Badly: Kardashian Kid Komes, Naked Supermodels, And More Charlie (NSFW Yada Yada Yada) June 21, 2013Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Scandals.
Tags: baby, cedars sinai, Charlie Sheen, hook-up, john mayer, kanye west, katy perry, Kim Kardashian, naked, penthouse, Russell Brand, selma blair, text
Kim Kardashian’s baby came prematurely, something we can assume never afflicts her baby daddy, Kanye West, who after a long gestational absence, did show up for the birth. Sadly, since the arrival was inconveniently unscheduled, Kim didn’t get the VIP suite she’d reserved at Cedars Sinai and had to grunt and push with just regular millionaires and CEO’s. How she survived such an indignity is anyone’s guess.
Now the only remaining speculation is over the child’s name: Kandy, Kwerky, Kansas, Korona, and Kerfuffel are all in the running, but in honor of her famous mother, I’m hoping for Kaboose. [As of press time, unconfirmed reports reveal the child's name as...wait for it...North. We can only hope that the middle name is Bynorth. I still think they should have gone with Kaboose, since it won't be more than a year that Kanye West is at every compass point except the one occupied by Kim.]
Age is a cruel mistress. This is a current photo of first generation supermodel Lauren Hutton:
which ain’t half-bad for 69 years old. But here’s the rule: Do your nude photos while gravity is only a vicious rumor. This is Lauren in 1962, when she did a photo shoot for Penthouse’s Bob Guccione:
Listen, when I was an undergrad at Northwestern, I had every copy of Penthouse from 1971 on…and these pics are downright demure. Hutton should be grateful that she knew Guccione in the 60′s, before he decided tha Heff and Playboy were a bunch of puritanical pussies.
Lauren Hutton wasn’t the only naked celebrity of the week. Giuliana Rancic, on a dare from Fashion Police cohost and 80th birthday girl Joan Rivers, Rancic did an E News segment in the altogether…although the only real beneficiaries were the studio crew, because all we got at home was this:
Damned American TV!
Katy Perry and Russell Brand are back in the news. Katy reveals in a Vogue interview that Brand let her know he was filing for divorce on News Years Eve 2011…via a text message. Classsssssy! Katy goes on to hint that there was some other dark secret involved with the divorce, but she’s keeping it safe and secure in Al Gore’s lockbox “for a rainy day”. It’s hard to imagine what she could possibly have on Russell Brand that would ever embarrass him, up to and including photos of him engaged in group sex with goats, midgets, and Betty White. After all, the guy is shameless, witnessed by the fact that he hit on FOX’s Mika Brzezinski, at one point referring to her on live TV as a “shaft-grasper”:
Meanwhile, Katy continues to display her refined and thoughtful taste in mates by hooking up again with John Mayer:
But John Mayer is a much more genteel fellow than Brand. I expect that when he dumps Katy (over/under: 6 months) he’ll serve notice with a Gorilla-gram. Hey, nothing says relationship dissolution like a jungle primate.
Finally, it looks as if Charlie Sheen is off his meds again…or more likely, back on them. It’s more than a little ironic that Charlie stars on “Anger Management”, because clearly Charlie has some issues. When co-star Selma Blair began voicing her concerns about Charlie’s somewhat flexible interpretation of rehearsal times and scheduled arrival on the set and being sober and so forth, Charlie responded in typical Charlie fashion, with a dash of Russell Brand thrown in. He had Blair fired forthwith, and let her know via text message, and since he had already used up the “desperate guzzler of douche agua” on Farrah Abraham last week, he just went with the old tired standby of calling Blair a c*&! As always, Charlie…classssy.
Celebrities Behaving Badly: Underboob, Sideboob, Just A Bevy Of Boobs February 15, 2013Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, religion, Scandals.
Tags: adele, allen ginsburg, chris brown, danieal radcliffe, dress code, gay, grammys, john mayer, katy perry, rihanna, Ron Jeremy, sideboob, underboob
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It’s another slow week in celebrity hijinks, and most of the fireworks occurred quite a while back, at Sunday’s Grammys. I think it’s safe to say that the network dress code was a dismal failure. I’ve thoughtfully provided some examples of the most grievous violators.
Award for “Is it cold in here or are you just glad to see me?”
Award for “Sideboob doesn’t count if it’s part of massive cleavage”:
Award for “See Under: Underboobs”:
By the way, there’s no love lost between Katy Perry and Rihanna. Katy specifically requested not to be seated at the same table as Rihanna because she disapproves of Rihanna’s revitalized romance with serial thug Chris Brown…which is interesting, given Perry’s outstanding choices in male companionship.
Yo, John…the White Rabbit called and he wants his jacket back.
There was at least one other celebrity at the Grammy’s who doesn’t know the secret handshake of the Chris Brown Fan Club. Adele may have been wearing a flowered dress, but she’s no shrinking violet. Adele reportedly got right up in Brown’s grill (which was most recently totalled in a purported paparazzi pursuit) over Brown’s recent run-in’s with Frank Ocean:
Yo, bitch, I show you fire in the rain…
Let’s take just a moment to talk about a real boob. Tim Tebow, who is more famous for thanking Jesus for his skills than actually having any skills, is scheduled to speak in April at 11,000 member First Baptist Dallas. The preacher in this place has called Mormonism, Judaism, and Islam “religions from the pit of hell”, predicted that the re-election of Barack Obama would lead to the rise of the Antichrist, and claimed that “70% of the gay population has AIDS”. Hallelujah, Tim! Could you please apply for associate minister? It’s a way better gig for you than third string quarterback.
Speaking of Jesus:
Note to Kim K: Sure, I can see the resemblance, but I bet you have the better sex tape.
In the department of “How gay is that?”:
Daniel Radcliffe, doing his utmost best to avoid being stereotyped as Harry Potter until he’s old enough for Social Security, is playing gay lefty poet Allen Ginsburg in “Kill Your Darlings”, replete with ample explicit gay love scenes. Radcliffe is taking considerable grief over the role, but pointedly notes that no one seems to make a fuss when gay actors portray heterosexuals (see under: Neil Patrick Harris as Barney in “How I Met Your Mother”). Even the film’s director, John Krokidas, notes that Radcliffe was an edgy casting choice, being neither American nor Jewish, but Krokidas’ boyfriend had a different assessment: “Of course he’s Jewish — everyone in the world knows that. Didn’t you see the shots from ‘Equus‘? He’s only British from the waist up.’” On behalf of Ron Jeremy and myself, I must protest that stereotype in the strongest terms! (Ok, not so much me, but Ron Jeremy.) (Geez, it was a long way to go for that line.)
For reasons I can’t quite fathom, Hugh Jackman, star of “Les Miserables” also suffers from rumors that he’s playing for the pink team. Maybe it’s because like Radcliffe, he played a gay character in “Return To OZ”:
But on the other side of the coin, he’s also “Wolverine”
Admittedly, this guy wouldn’t make a good gynecologist, but I’m gonna bet he likes girls. Just sayin’.
That’s enough for this week. Charlie, if you’re reading, how about you score a little blow and lock a hooker in the bathroom at Chateau Marmont? I’m dyin’ here.
Obama Should Win For This Alone November 5, 2012Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Politics.
Tags: blue dress, forward, katy perry, logo, obama
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Celebrities Behaving Badly: Waiting For A Scandal (But There’s Still Some Naked Stuff) October 26, 2012Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Scandals.
Tags: ballot dress, church, joanna krupa, katy perry, kris jenner, nip slip, Ron Jeremy, see-through blouse
This has been perhaps the worst week ever in celebrity misbehavior…in the sense that there really hasn’t been any. I’m going to postulate that they’re all on temporary hiatus while waiting for Barack Obama and Mitt Romney to stop hogging their TV time. In support of this theory, I give you Katy Perry at a recent concert:
It’s notable that Mitt Romney is projected just south of an area he intends to legislate into oblivion.
Speaking of making a statement with your outterwear, do you remember Joanna Krupa, who danced with Derek Hough on DWTS in 2009
and is now one of the Housewives of Somewhere You’re Happy Not To Be? Well, here she is now:
Her top says, “I just know I forgot something, but I can’t remember what it was…”
Which reminds me that the closest thing we had to a genuine scandal this week was a shocking Twitterpic of Kris Jenner in her Halloween costume:
Aside from the vague Janet Jacksonesque hint of areola, the real question it brings to mind is, “I wonder what the hell Wonder Woman is doing with Bruce Jenner?” (And secondarily: Are those things real? Answer: As real as any in Hollywood.)
Don’t worry about Christina Aguilera. She may be retiring from her gig on “The Voice”, but she won’t be unemployed for long. She’s been offered $3 million to act as spokesperson for TheBigandBeautiful.com, a plus-size dating site:
Hey, there may be enough junk in this trunk to start a yard sale, but if Christina is happy in her own skin, then we should be happy in her own skin (or something like that).
Is that a crucifix in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?: Ok, so porn icon Ron Jeremy actually gave a sermon at evangelical Daybreak Church in western Michigan on the subject of….you guessed it, pornography. It’s even more ironic, given that Jeremy is a nice Jewish boy from New York, equipped in such a manner as to dispell all those unfounded rumors about inadequate Kosher salamis.
“Bless me father, for I have sinned…again and again and again and again…”
The second most famous South Korean in the world: Must-see video of UN Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon (second cousin to Yan-Kee Dog) dancing Gangnam Style.
The Taylor Swift-Conor Kennedy summertime romance is over. Can’t wait to hear the new single, “I Cried Me A Chappaquiddick”. Also the end for Eva Longoria and Mark Sanchez. She’s tried pro basketball players and pro quarterbacks. Can professional bloggers be far behind?
Finally, the truth comes out: Rod Stewart says he “is as heterosexual as they come (which under the circumstances might have been an unfortunate turn of phrase)”. Specifically, in response to a direct question from Katie Couric, he denied the urban legend that he once orally satisfied seventeen(!!) sailors in San Diego and had to have his stomach pumped. I didn’t watch the video…I don’t want to ruin my imagined version of Katie Couric asking that question. Now that the ugly rumor was put to rest, Stewart bid adieu to Ms. Couric and left for lunch with Tom Cruise and John Travolta.
Celebrities Behaving Badly: Where’s Waldo? September 7, 2012Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Politics, Scandals, Uncategorized.
Tags: break-up songs, jake gyllenhaal, john mayer, katy perry, Kennedy, Madonna, mitt romney, nicki minaj, pussy, taylor swift, vma
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I didn’t watch live, since Mrs. Left and I were dancing at the time, and I didn’t watch on DVR because I thought the better rock ‘n roll show was happening in Charlotte, but I did catch the video clip of Swift’s closing performance at last night’s MTV Video Music Awards. She did “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” which is reputedly her break-up song after a brief affair with Jake Gyllenhaal. It’s worth watching the clip. She absolutely nailed the performance, although she’ll never be mistaken for Madonna where the dancing portion is concerned. She did, however, do something Madonna USED to do. She sang live, and she didn’t miss a note, even as she was attempting the simple choreography while clearly trying to do the eight-count in her head. Taylor Swift has made a cottage industry out of writing acerbic odes to ex-lovers. Previous victims have included Taylor Lautner and John Mayer (who incidentally has enjoyed more high end Hollywood pussy than the LA Humane Society). Clearly, Swift’s sweet fresh-faced exterior hides a seething psycho-bitch within. Swift is currently stalking…umm, I mean dating…Conor Kennedy. If history provides any insight, this relationship’s sell-by date is rapidly approaching. Before Swift pens her next “eat shit and die you pencil-dick douchebag” break-up song for Kennedy, I’ve got three very important words that she’d be wise to consider: Mary Jo Kopechne. Just sayin’.
Speaking of John Mayer and…well, you know…
Word on the street is that he and Katy Perry are back together. Purrrrrfect.
In the interest of full disclosure, I stole the following bit (paraphrased) from Jon Stewart, but it’s worth repeating: We are clearly on our way to living in a post-racial America when Seal can refer to Heidi Klum schtupping her white bodyguard as “fornicating with the hired help”.
It’s been another week of cross-pollination between Hollywood and D.C. Chuck Norris, who was apparently separated from Ted Nugent at birth, has watched his Blu-Ray edition of “The Lord of the Rings” one time too many. He said this week that if Obama is re-elected, the US faces “1000 years of darkness”. He’d originally said “1000 years of darkies”, but they re-edited the tape when someone thought that might be a little offensive.
Finally, in the category of “politics makes strange bedfellows”, this week’s most articulate and heartfelt endorsement in a song: “I’m a Republican voting for Mitt Romney, you lazy bitches is fuckin’ up the economy” from
Nicki Minaj. There’s nothing else to say.
Celebrities Behaving Badly: Pussy Riot, Y’All Are In Chains August 17, 2012Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment, Scandals, Uncategorized.
Tags: anal tattoos, dave mustaine, katy perry, nudity, obama, pussy riot, Romney, silversun pickups, wardrobe malfunction
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Ok, so it’s a week where there’s a lot of overlap between entertainment and politics, but I suppose that can be said of every week. First, a word about why, despite all our blemishes and dirty laundry, we continue to be the home of the free and the land of the brave and absolutely positively the best place in the history of the planet in which to live:
This is what happens in Russia if you piss off the president. Call it pussy under glass, caged pussy, or pussy-in-a-box, but this is the punk band Pussy Riot, the members of which were sentenced to three years in the gulag for performing a song critical of Vladimir Putin in a church.
Contrast that with Dave Mustaine:
frontman for the acclaimed ear-bleeding-eye-gauging-make-you-want-to-vomit-til-you-spew-your-asshole-out-your-pie-hole metal band, Megadeath. This delusional born-again headbanger screamed in a concert in Singapore that President Obama had personally staged the massacres in Aurora and Milwaukee, and that the US is turning into “Nazi America“. Not only is he allowed to remain unimprisoned, but to reproduce. God bless America. And by the way, why would anyone listen to anything, including so-called music, let alone political punditry, emanating from someone or something called Megadeath? (Whereas “Pussy Riot” is clearly a source of wisdom and revelation.)
At the other end of the political spectrum, there was the Silversun Pickups (again, who comes up with these names?) issuing a cease and desist order to the Mitt Romney campaign. It was another case of some right-wing politician hijacking a rock ‘n roll song without asking the artist’s permission. Although I think it would have been delicious irony to let Romney keep using “Panic Switch”, since that’s exactly what the voters will be doing if they vote for him in November.
Getting back to the things for which this column is revered by all two dozen of its regular readers…no Friday would be complete without some celebrity nudity, and I’m not one to toy with my public. It turns out that Katy Perry is soothing her hurt after the divorce by swapping bodily fluids with John Mayer (whose biography will no doubt be titled the same thing as the Russian punk band above). In other fluids, she took some time to visit a water park in San Dimas:
and apparently took one slide too many:
No harm, no foul. She was, however, awarded a trophy for the only ass whiter than Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan.
Speaking of Katy Perry’s ass (I am the master of the subtle segue, am I not?), you’ll never guess what the next big thing is going to be. Really, you’ll never guess:
The next big thing is…wait for it…anal tattoos. Come to think of it, that’d be a great name for a rock band: “Ladies and gentlemen! Get on your feet, put your hands together, and give it up for “Anal Tattoos”!” If this isn’t a sign of the apocalypse, it’s hard to imagine what would be.
Tags: american idol, bra, divorce, Jennifer Lopez, Katie Holmes, katy perry, scientology, Steven Tyler, tom cruise
So Katie Holmes has escaped a controlling overbearing paternalistic cult religion and fled to…Catholicism. Thanks for the unintended irony, Katie. I suppose that giving up E-meters for Christ crackers is a step in the right direction:
Reading all the material on Katie and Tom has provided me with one bit of interesting history. I had no idea that she was another native of Toledo, Ohio. Me, Katie Holmes, and Jamie Farr:
Where else are you going to find a threesome like that?
Katie reportedly left Tom Cruise to save their child Suri from the clutches of the evil Church of Scientology, which by all reports operates something like the Mafia. The only way to leave is in a pine box. Somehow Katie avoided that fate, at least partially because she had the help of her father, a top divorce lawyer in Toledo…and everyone knows you do not fuck with powerhouse legal eagles from Toledo.
Katy Perry reportedly left Russell Brand for a different reason: She wanted her ova to escape the evil clutches of Brand’s sperm (which reputedly has crossed more lips than Folger’s Coffee). Brand wanted children and Perry wanted to keep selling records to children, and she didn’t think she’d be quite as appealing in that cupcake bra that shoots whipped cream if she added a basketball under her belly button. She probably ought to stick to that one instead of her recent addition, the spinning wheel of peppermint bra:
Her insurance company has banned the apparatus since they deem it a hazard to her health after her hair was caught in it during a recent performance. Perry’s comment on the matter was enlightening: “My hair got caught in the wheels of my spinning peppermint bra and began to coil around and around. I’m forced to just go with it so, by the end of the song, it looked quite like I was licking my own tit. What a girl does for her art.” Call me a sick puppy if you want, but I’d kill to hear Katy Perry saying “it looked quite like I was licking my own tit”. Better yet…oh, never mind.
Other than L. Ron Hubbard comforting Tom Cruise via skype from interworld, the biggest celebrity news of the week comes from American Idol. First Steven Tyler announced that he’d give up whispering incoherent nonsense on “American Idol” and go back to screaming incoherent nonsense with Aerosmith, and then Jennifer Lopez just today announced that she’s tired of suffering ever-increasing booty-spread from all those hours in the judge’s chair and will now return her fulltime attention to schtupping twenty-something production dancers.
Yo, dawg, that just leaves veteran Randy Jackson at the judges’ table, and rumor has it that he may go back to his prior career as…what the hell did he do before AI? The quality of judging at AI hasn’t exactly been of SCOTUS quality since Simon Cowell jumped ship anyway, so maybe three newbies wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Given that the last three attempts have been the sparkling wit of Ellen DeGeneres, the insightful wisdom of Steven Perry, and the dazzling sequins of J. Lo, here’s a suggestion:
So when an audition really stinks, the judges can throw…well, you get it.
Finally, tattoos in the news: Miley Cyrus, soon to be wed, has a new one on her forearm: “So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.” Which sort of reminds me of the old joke’s punch line, “Welcome to Jamaica and have a nice day.” Meanwhile, Kelsey Grammer had his new bride’s name, “Kayte” tattooed on his right hip, which immediately makes me think two things:
1- The over/under on this marriage instantly dropped from two years to six months.
2- It’s spelled K-A-T-E. The “Y” just guarantees a pretentious bitch, a pole dancer, or a pretentious pole dancer.
Celebrities Behaving Badly: Not So Much June 29, 2012Posted by Benjamin Wendell in Entertainment.
Tags: cyber-sex, katy perry, Kelly Osbourne, masturbation, movie, rehab, Terrell Owens
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What a total disappointment of a week. When the biggest scandal anyone can fabricate is something called “Fast and Furious”, you know it’s going to be a snoozer.
No real wives of Peoria inadvertently tweeted their hoo-ha’s this week, but one NFL/reality star came close. Some woman claimed that she’d spent some quality time cyber-sexing with Terrell Owens and she’d preserved several screen-saves of T.O. doing the five finger rumba with Little Terrell. Sadly, none of those images have yet been released to make their inevitable rounds throughout the net. But just so you have some idea of what you might be missing, I’ve included this poor substitute:
See? It even forms an “O” for T.O. (Note to readers: I’ll understand if you bail at this point. It really isn’t going to improve as you go down.)
I suppose the biggest celebrity story of the week is NBC dropping Ann Curry from “Today” and replacing her with Savannah Guthrie. Who? And who?
There was at least a little crazy-assed psycho-bitch action this week. Kelly Osbourne did what any sister would do after learning that her brother has MS. She got totally sloshed in the first class section of an LA to Atlanta flight and had to be just about carried off the plane. So much for the benefits of rehab. Osbourne admits she’s fallen off the wagon, but isn’t making any apologies. Hey, she may have a few cocktails, but she’s a whole distillery shy of being Lindsay Lohan.
Little known fact: Too much vodka turns your hair purple.
Speaking of purple hair, Katy Perry’s long-awaited biopic, “Part of Me”, was released last week. It’s only deeply narcissistic Hollyweirdos who feel justified in releasing autobiographies at age 28. It would be like my grandson, who just turned two, releasing, “All I’ve Learned: A Memoir”. Gimme a break.
And finally, also in the category of really self-important biographies of angst-ridden young stars whose total life experiences would barely fill a shot glass, comes this best headline of the week:
(Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)